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flawless MeganF.

Lost

everything dissapears
but your still here
your thoughts like mine
clouding up my mind
the room starts spinning
everythings a blur
but i can feel your heart beating
so i try to move slow
room comes to a halt
but your gone
no where to be found
do you hear me
but its silence
only silence
i breath it in
choking on what you never botherd to say
so now im screaming
yelling everything that comes to mind
then everything goes dark
save me cause ive been slipping
on the edge
find me

OMG

this is how i feel

Letter number one

dear you,
i dont want to give in
i will never forget what you did
ruined everything that took so long
to build something so strong
broke everything i stood on
i began falling somewhere
in a place i didnt wanna be
somewhere without you
i feel trapped hit a place
where i feel like the only solution
is the old you
so come back please cause ive been waiting
i guess you can't seee that
your memory lives on
so heres letter number one
something you'll never get to read

Sometimes i wonder

sometimes i wonder what goes through your mind
when you kiss me
does it feel the same ?
or did something change
sometimes i wonder if you regret
what you did as much as i wish you did
but i would never know
because yu wouldnt say
sometimes i wonder
what i did to make you love me so much
what i could of done to love you back
the way you wanted me to
the way i couldnt
what is there to do ?
sometimes a wonder a lot of things
wish someone would just let me know

waiting...

your memory lasts forever
even if i try to erase it
im suddenly always thinking
how long it will take you to say it
just tell me that you're sorry
and say it was all your fault
maybe its the only way
to accept the fact that you're gone
do you think of our conversations
when your staring at your ceiling
spacing out past the world
do you feel that rush of feelings
does it hit you so quickly
or do you try to supress it
i just want you to see it
so i can try and forget this
im waiting for an apology
i know will never come
and believing that you'll say it
keeps me from moving on
so currently im sitting here
writing this stupid poem
cause its the only way to fight
the emotions taking over

save me,

i've been falling
forever it seems
with no end
i took a turn
found myself somewhere
hurt and alone
seeking what i need the most
ive been falling forever
waiting for something
that i know will never arrive
but what can i do
i need someone
i need you to
save me

^_^

im sorry im not the person yu thought i was .

I could say

Yu could think that 
From a distance everything was fine
But look closely at all the 
Tears where mistakes were made
Where fights took place
Everything seemed fine
Everything on the inside 
Fried by stress
I could say that
By the current attitude
Running through me 
That I don't care about you
But that would be a lie 
And as much as I'm trying to cover it
Every little smile killed me inside
Your happy while Im miserable
Things like this don't end well
I knew that
Expectations were held to high
For you  
I was thinking about this for 
So long so why is it that
I'm the one falling apart
Forget all this love stuff
I'm done

love her

i reallly love miranda kerr
why are girls born this pretty ?

love this

Real

your about as real as i need you to be

I'm moving on

the world keeps spinning 

I won't keep waiting 

forevers gone

Memories

you're a memory

but your faded

always here

but somehow gone

You

Everything seems like its standing still like i could be here for ever and not even notice it I dont know where we're headed or when this will end but i hope it takes a while cause I like it where I am

dear readers,

I usually say what im feeling in a poem but lately i can't for the past few weeks I don't feel a need tro write, I don't have anything to say. Everything out in the open or hiding somewhere but regardless I can't make any of my poems work. so, if  your reading sorry (:

behance

South Africa : BEHANCE

Knock Knock who's there ?

the world seems to be at its end
the search for something
we don't believe in
expecting the worst
hope for the best
do you understand the situation i'm in?
what do I believe?
who cares?
god please god are you out there?
but theres no answer
knock knock no ones there
sit alone lifes gone
20 years wasted
so light the blunt in ya hand
can you hear me?
do you understand
no one listens anymore
silence fills the air
am I more then this
no this is who i've become
silent, quiet, screaming
hiding behind my books
behind my words
behind pencils and sketch pads
behind what I can't have
money money money
girls boys girls
what else is there
in this lonely messed up world

No one hears me

the city speaks

so no one hears me

with the splash of water against

their feet

the beep of the horns

the talk of the street

everything is silent

so no one hears me scream

hmmm,

Inspire me --*

formspring.me

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L O V E & This relationship

This Relationship ;

He loves me way more then I love him -

and when you call at 2 50 in the morning

just cause you want to hear my voice
when yours sounds so shakey
something inside me wishes
i could of loved you the way you still love me

but i can't do that lies lead to heartbreak

and i couldn't ever break your heart

I feel for you way too much

Dear Summer,

can you hurry up and get here <3

xoxo

- Karen

War with you

i fought through everything

this was a promise i wish

i had never kept

lies entangled in truths

don't know how to tell

which from who

from you ? which i have

found so hard to trust

so hard to follow

we've fought too many battles

I'm losing ammo

your losing ambition 

our love is fading

there's no need for waiting

when the war with you is over

from Behance

This is it

this picture reminded me of Daniel 

feels like a Sunday morning 

slowly the end is creeping in 

lights fading from the room

giving me this goodbye feeling 

lately my worlds been spinning 

for how long i've been waiting

here on my messy bed i've been sitting 

i've been replaying everything

stop rewind pause play

yeah...

this is it

haha so true

ONE YEAR

April 20th I completed one year of having this blog. Thanks to all the readers (:

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LIGHTS

Lights Checkkk her outtt :) http://www.myspace.com/lights

thats so cool ... her name is Lights

what we're so afraid of

we fear love
because love means being vulnerable
being vulnerable shows weakness
and weakness is pain
and in pain we are hopeless
drown in sorrows
in helpless hopeless tears
of things that will never end
we fight it the idea of feelings
and accepting
because accepting the fear
the pain accepting the troubles
accepting love means that
we are doing something that is beyond our control
it'll drive us all crazy
accepting all this
but with love we also need to learn to let go
because those who sit in the past
will stay there as the world moves on
changing while they are forever the same

the fear

"No I'm not the man i used to be lately see you met me at an interesting time and if my past is any sign of your future you should be warned before I let you inside" John Mayer

words can only say so much
actions are what we are waiting for
its the little things you do
that pull me through
and all the big things that i adore
love a word we tend to shy away from
means so much but said so quick
feels used and jaded
somehow the meaning of the word
became so unappreciated
id rather break your heart a thousand times
before i ever saw mine shatter and fall
maybe its the fear of getting hurt
that makes it better to feel nothing at all

im so happy

its how so far it only took one time
how one kiss had me hypnotized
how just thinking about it
gives me butterflies
how it doesnt bother me
when your with me
how your smile
drives me absolutely crazy
how theres no one like you
how stupid I sound when I say things like this
but I don't care cause its a new feeling
and I don't wanna think about endings
i dont want to think about leaving
i want to think about now
and us and forever can wait
so i dont stress it
dont mind it
its just there
for this moment
ill just dream about the present

quote: the old me

is it so bad to disagree with who I used to be

Strange

I could save you the story
I could omit both the heartbreaks
I could skip to the part where
somewhere I lost it
I built up my wall
never let any one in
but some how you came along
and took everything
never before had it felt like this
one kiss and that was it
feels like a rush
everything is calm
but moving so quick
my body feels strange
not used to the feeling
is it weird I already know
that I need you

Feelings

i dont want to get hurt
but i can feel it
this strange feeling
somehow i care
i wanna make it work
don't want to do anything
to mess up what i've started
I wanna prove you wrong
I can do this i know it
because finally after
three years somewhere inside
i caught feelings

Kanye

" reach for the stars so if you fall yu land on a cloud " - Kanye West

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Dangerous

I've seen your face before
Somewhere so familiar
somewhere safe
it's just something to hard to explain
this feeling this excitement
of something new
I've never had before
making its way
making it okay for me to let go
of everything else
that I once felt
situation is numbing
this feeling seems dangerous

A Treasure

and if all ends well
then this will live forever
i won't ever forget it


So many choices so many mistakes
I know that i've made
but don't hold something
so old against me
because with time
we've got to learn to deal with the pain
deal with things that will never be the same
forever changed
so bittersweet this farewell
so unexpected but so necessary
If this happened
it happened for reasons
for which I know not of
but they did
and I won't regret a thing
a kiss a smile a touch
I'll keep it inside
to always remember
not a secret to me
but a treasure

Replacement girlfriend - Le Love

Makes it hard to hope that it won't be the same story the next time. The next time you talk to a somewhat cute nice guy you find yourself wondering how long he would stick around before disappearing like the rest. Yet somehow I still hope to have a real relationship where I am not just a temporary replacement where I am the real thing that actually matters.

Table of Contents - edited

April - Best friends for Never
May - Hurt
June - Realizing
July - "And as quick as it came, it went"
August - Reality hit me
September- Inspiration
October - Happy
November - The Past
December - Distance
January - The Future
February - Somewhere in the Middle
March - Change 

What's so completely wrong

i can't feel anything
maybe i just wish you'd hold me
tell me to relax
fix on the feeling that's been making me this way
but im thinking about everything and nothing
help me figure out whats so completely wrong

No longer

im tired of you telling me how much you'll miss me
but never take the time to see me
im here i've been here for a while
and yet at every given chance
i still stay behind with out you
so don't tell me you feel a certain way
i know how things change

Melissa Polinar - Back to Me

we were young,
willing, though unable
to think of Love as stable,
too proud to compromise

when will it be over

really hate this month

Shatterd Mirror

i shattered into millions of pieces for so long

laying hopelessly across rough ground

waiting for something to come around

pick up the pieces one by one

close every crack every wound i ever had

some parts are missing

some parts are gone

but I'm not as fragile as before

try to break me again

lets see this time who'll fall

Shontelle

Falling out of love is hard
Falling for betrayal is worst
Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know ♥

John Mayer ... again

I was a killer, was the best they'd ever seen I'd steal your heart before you ever heard a thing I'm an assassin and I had a job to do Little did I know that girl was an assassin too - John Mayer ♥

Standing here

take me apart put me together again
there's something a lot better of what's changing
come closer love
till our lips touch
tell me you feel that spark
hold my hand it doesnt feel forced
this whole thing
seems like i've known you for so long
finally time to reunite
still unsure
but soon i'll free fall
make sure your standing here
at the end of it all

city

What the clock read

its 2 08 and ive been staring at the same screen
ive been playing with my love ring
trying to avoid our fighting
its 2 09 ive started looking at my bracelets
finding all the traces of
the fingerprints you left behind
its 2 10 and by then im staring at the fone
wondering when it will come back to life
and now 4 minutes have gone by
ive refreshed the page 5 times
waiting for your name to say
you're sorry that you
never meant to make me cry
but you don't no you wont
ever apologize

Superman

So many quys let me fall
had to pick myself up
dust myself off
so i got used to never qivinq a fck
kissing without thinking
but your some type of different
im still debating weather or not
i should go through with this
all i need is my superman
i`ll be your supergirl
just hold on tight
don't let me qo

involved

everything goes wrong when feelings get involved - KRD__*

Formsprinq

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Jonathan Foer

"Why didn't I learn to treat everything like it was the last time. My greatest regret was how much I believed in the future."

Stolen

kisses stolen so sweetly by lips misguided
making there way towards me
i melt in words you didnt bother to say
my body tingles at touches so slight
you're voice trickles so closely to my face
i disappear in your warm embrace
you trapped me with your sweet looks
your bright smile take me away
and never bring me back
lock me there in your heart
never to be replaced

On my way home

because life comes as it wants
and regretting and never forgetting
leaves you stuck in a place
you don't want to be
it leaves you stranded
and slowly it waits for you to realize
patience is key
wait while life comes you're way
changes will occur
others stay the same
and where ever in the middle it ends
you'll be there back on the road
back on the fast paced life
and eventually with patience
you'll find your way home

Glimpse

while some are chapters
others are merely sentences
only a glimpse into the life
you missed
you were a mistake
so many i knew i shouldn't have made
but who could tell me i was wrong
when everything felt right
no one could split me apart
from what i had created
a fairy tale story
in a catastrophic world
where things
we're not supposed to end this way

Letting Go

theres always a promise that i can't keep
something i think that's to impossible to reach
to many things are constantly changing
and sorrys and forevers got lost in transition
so were awoken by screams
because somewhere in the mess
you lost me
you're wins always seem bittersweet
something lost and another gained
one door slams shut while another opens
we're constantly weighing in the bad
struggling with the pain
but soon you'll see
love and happiness is not far away

Sometime

and in between arguments and fights
some where in between distance and time
I lost you
between words
sometime when you never came back
somewhere between lies
I decided I was done

Lock and Key by Sarah Dessen

" but i was sure of something, too: it's a lot easier to be lost then found. It's the reason we're always searching, and rarely discovered---so many locks, not enough keys." pq 365

perfect

we stumble to find the perfect words
but i am no longer looking
words are over rated
just show me
show me everything
the world our love
our life show me everything
i need a perfect day

Where I was

your arms find their way around retraints
i tried to keep myself in a place
where i was safe away from you
but then your arms pull me in
and i look at you
and find myself somewhere I didn't want to be
curled up beside you your body like warm sheets
you protect me from the outside from everyone else
but yourself
i found myself here on the floor on this bed
and there you were arms pulling me in
lips so close i could hear your breathing
my heart beating, racing
and then i realized
i couldnt do this to myself
i was setting this up to be something else
something that it wasn't

Table of Contents - 5

April - Best friends for Never
May - The Dark Ages
June - Realizing
July - "And as quick as it came, it went"
Auqust - Raw
September- Finding myself
October - Happy
November - The Past
December - Distance
January - The Future

John Mayer

good to know its all a qame dissapointment has a name its heartbreak warfare - Heartbreak warfare

love is really nothing but a dream that keeps waking me - Edge of desire

If I were free

and if i could be free
from this world
from the things that hold me
how would it be ?
would i do what i please
i could walk through grassy fields
look at the birds and the bee's
i could lay there &
let the world take me in
i could sit on my rooftop
watch the stars so bright
on summer nights
i could sing in the streets
without a look from a stranger
with out comments or remarks
i could be me, if i were free
i could watch the snow flakes fall
fall from the tree`s like the orange
and red leaves on autumn afternoon's
i could watch the rain
slap against my window pane
i could sit there for days
i could be me if i were free

Standstill

i pressed delete again
the computer asked if i was sure
well am i ?
everything thats missing
everything i've been trying to get back
its not here
and i wonder if thats the only thing that stays the same
the only thing in life that doesn't change
life moves on and doesnt stop for no one
i've been at this standstill
like the ones in movies
where everyone rushes around you
and yur in the middle
still slowly moving through crowds
slowly moving through life

Day 1

Breath

silent walls keep hidden secrets
but they never respond
never react to the emotions you're feeling -- krd__*

my heads pounding with regret
words cant explain
mouths dont move
we dont speak
we just breath
breath in the silence
hoping to exhale
whats just happened
my hand wants to reach over
to the nearest object throw it across the room
hear it smash against the floor
broken falling to pieces
like me
but i don't move
and if it weren't for you
words would fly through every corner
bounce of every wall
i would say it all
but i just sit i just breath
holding in everything

Secret in a Bottle

There's so much that you don't say
so much you keep hidden away
you're like a bottle off in the sea
alone and silent holding
the secret messege inside
away from the damadge
i could be

Good Day ; Bad Days

I don't understand what happens
from one day to the next
we get along so well only to finish
in a messy stupid argument
a month long silence
only to come back
right where we left off
we've finished and started
but this new distance
seems permenant
have we run out of time
run out of reasons why this is
what it's been
a couple good days
and a million Bad

Sorry's

we've apologized so many times
sorrys are starting to sound like our hello's
your lips no longer sweet
but bitter with regret
your eyes distant
looking at everything but me

The Sound Goodbye's Make : Part 2

life has taken its unsuspected turns
goodbyes are due soon
don't think i'll be saying goodbye to you
winter nights will turn to spring mornings
and summer afternoons
the sun sets and by dusk im gone
by then ill be so far from home
from this place so many miles away
without a tear shed 
I've been trying to run
running far away from the past
and it may not be the best choice
but at this point
its the only option i have
"Maybe easiest way for it to happen
Is if I leave
I’ll come back sometime
Come to see if you’ve become
The person you wanted to be "
 
i swear i can tell the future - April poem 2009: the sound goodbye's make

Chase me forever

& being closed off never had its advantages
so i've started on a journey
on the pursuit of happiness
but silly me i've wasted my time
trying to fnd it in places
it would never be

So far

Only awkward stares
only silent tears
we've made it this far
but where do we go from here
too many hurt feelings
too many words unspoken
by the fear
the one we hide
you will never see me break
so i had to make the words cry

Goodnight Love

how do you escape a memory
make it past the time
where i was yours
and you were mine
summer nights
palm trees
fireflies
sweet dreams
goodnight love
until morning

Progress

No progress
just distance
far away
goodbye love
goodbye us
i wont miss you
when you're gone

Words

word after endless word
but nothing makes sense
nothing comes together
 need some type of insight
little yellow light bulb glow
to many words scrambling
love hate regret
apologize forgive forget
goodbye distance
" i realize " and kisses
everything gets old
everything is old i need something new
something else to do

Maroon 5

"Built a wall around my heart, never let it fall apart. but strangely i wish secretly it would fall down while i'm asleep. if you dont know then you cant care and you show up but you're not there "

Table of Contents - 4

April - Best friends for Never
May - the Dark Ages
June - Realizing
July - "And as quick as it came, it went"
Auqust - Raw
September- Finding myself
October - Happy
November - the Past
December - Distance

Sex

your finger tips
how softly the slip
around my hips
your soft lips
touch mine
my eyes close and we fall slowly
against the pillow case
i feel the warmth of your
chest pressed against
mine we play cat and mouse beneath the sheets
and find ourselves at places
we never thought we'd meet
fingers linger
toes touch
lips kiss
never say to much