Before You Know

longing for what hurts the most
I pretend im in no hurry
but patiently i am waiting
seeking in vein
i save myself the worry
running away from those that love the most
i save myself from stitches
trying to heal the broken wounds
that never seem to fade
save my self the bandaids
the alcohol the burning pain
the pain i used to blow away
but now leaves scars that never seem to go away
never could allow myself to become one
with another with a lover
a passion never would allow myself to become
the heart broken the one that cries from a cut
given by another
i save myself the pain of love
i walk away and emotion less thoughts
corrupt my brain
my heart is cold with memories of long ago
and before yu know i'm gone